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1月2日

Some science jokes!

 BIO Personals

I've been single-stranded too long! Lonely ATGCATG would like to pair up
with congenial TACGTAC.

Menage a trois! Ligand seeks two receptors into binding and mutual
phosphorylation. Let's get together and transduce some signals.

Some dates have called me a promotor. Others have referred to me as a real
operator. Personally, I think I'm just a cute piece of DNA who is still
looking for that special transcription factor to help me unwind.

Highly sensitive, orally active small molecule seeks stable well-structured
receptor who knows size isn't everything.

There must be a rational way to meet a date! I'm tired of hanging out in
those molecular diversity bars, hoping to randomly bump into the right
peptide. I want a molecule that will fit right into my active site and
really turn me on. I'll send you my crystal structure if you send me
yours!

Gene therapy graduate. After years of producing nothing but gibberish, I've
shed my exons and am ready to express my introns. All I need is a cute
vector to introduce me to the right host.

My RNA, I'm sorry I misread your UAAUAAUAA and inserted three tyrosines
when you repeatedly asked me to stop. Something got lost in the
translation. Please forgive me.

Naked DNA with sticky ends seeks kanamycin-resistant plasmid. EcoR1 sites
preferred.

Uninhibited virus seeks reason to make me shed my coat protein.

This very selective oliogonucleotide has been probing for just the right
target for long term hybridization.

Mature cell seeks same who still enjoys cycling and won't go apoptotic on
me. Let's fight senescence together!

I'm a prolific progenitor with great potential for growth and self-renewal.
Call me if you're a potent hematopoietic factor who still believes in
endless nights of colony stimulation.

I don't always express myself on the surface, but I'm looking for a signal
that you appreciate my complexity. Send me the right message that will
penetrate my membranes, turn on my protein expression and release my
potential energy.

----

What's out for the hottest new show on the Dizzy Channel.

A new dramatic series set in the hustle bustle world of high fashion
protein synthesis It's ...

                                 ROUGH ER

See the drama of these hot young ribosomes as they fight to save proteins,
surrounded by the harsh and cruel reducing environment of the big
cytoplasm.

Watch as the mutilated remains of spliced and modified RNA come into the ER
to be transformed into hardy new proteins. Ready to take on anything the
extracellular environment can throw at them, as they go for the Golgi.

Stay tuned to your TV listings for where to tune for

                                 ROUGH ER
                 (Sponsored by AAA, Amino Acids Anonymous)
-------------
Question:
What did the Smooth Endoplasmic Reticulum say the the Rough Endoplasmic
Reticulum?
Answer:
Is that Ribosome on you or are you happy to see me?
 
----------
 
what did the french biochemist do with his twins?  he baptised one and
saved the other for a control
 
-------
THE GRADUATE GAME OF LIFE (?)
[Adapted for ASCII]
Rules: Using one die, move your game piece the number of spaces that the die
indicates and try to be the first to succesfully defend your graduate work.
It's not as easy as it looks.


=================-------------------------------------------------------
|Welcome ->-> | |Cells didn't|Tube |Cells not |
|To square One | --> | grow |labelled Taq |competent |
|In the Graduate| | miss a turn|is really ExoIII|Are you? |
| Game of Life | | |Miss 2 turns |Go back 3 spaces|
=================------------------------------------------------------|
|congratulations!| |Controls didn't |
|You've graduated| |work again. |
|Run like hell, | |Go back 2 spaces|
|before they look| --------------------------------------------------|
|too closely at | |You failed |Leads backwards |course work |
|at your thesis. | | MCAT |on gel box |piles up. <- |
|----------------| |Advance 1 space|Go back 3 spaces|Miss a turn |
|Thesis rejected | ---------------------------------------------------
|You're dejected | |You failed |
|Advance 2 spaces| | LSAT |
|----------------| |Advance 1 space|
|Could not repeat| -----------------------------------------------------------|
|critical | |You failed |Too many exams|Found point|Read |
| experiment | | PSAT |to mark |deletion |sequencing gel |
|Advance 3 spaces| |Advance 1 space|Miss a turn |Miss a turn|inverted |
|----------------| -------------------------------------------|Go back 2spaces|
|Competitors | ------------------|
|scoop you on | |Subcloned PCR |
|results | |product backwards|
|Advance 4 spaces| |Miss a turn |
|----------------| ------------------------------------------------------------
|Collaborator | |Fell into coma while|Got drunk at party|Tuition due |
|faked all data | | | using ether | told of PI |Miss 3 turns while|
|Advance 5 spaces| | \ / Miss a turn |Miss a turn |working for summer|
|----------------| |-----------------------------------------------------------
|Your NMR sample | | | |
|is betalactamase| | \ / |
|Advance 6 spaces| |--------------------|-------------------------------------|
|----------------| | Dropped flask |Blotted gel onto|You passed the MCAT |
| ^ | | -> of pure protein |paper towels |Leave game now and |
| / \ | | Go back 3 spaces|Go back 2 spaces| be joyfull |
| | | -----------------------------------------------------------|
| | |Ran air through |
|----------------| |sizing column |
|Radiation badge | |Go back 4 spaces |
|lights | |--------------------|
|fluorescent | |Ultracentriguge tube|
|bulbes | |broke, lose sample |
|Miss 3 turns | |Miss a turn |
|----------------| |--------------------|
|Computer crashes| |You failed | |
| lose notes | |MCAT again \ / |
|Go back 3 spaces| |Advance 1 space . |
|-----------------------------------------------------------------------------|
|Writing you PI's| Commitee member|You failed PSAT |You failed |
|grant proposal |<- missed meeting |Getting desperate? |LCAT again |
|Miss 2 turns | Miss a turn. |Miss a turn |Advance 1 space |
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

All (and more) from:

http://www.xs4all.nl/~jcdverha/scijokes/12_3.html#subindex

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annie Geeeee发表:
If you were to expand my summer project, that game is what it would look like... sooo many things went wrong! Take it all with a shot of ethidium... mmmm red warmth...
1 月 27 日
Karlee发表:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
 
so bloody true its not funny.
 
one week left! *breathe* and it was only a trial run. gah~!
1 月 7 日

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